Forget the L's, I have A LOT of Wins.

It took me years to accept the fact that I will be living with a mental illness for the rest of my life. 

For the longest time, I though I was better. I thought I would never go back to that dark place. 

But time and time again, I woke up with those same dark thoughts.

Time and time again, I covered up my tears, scars, and pain with a smile and an obnoxious, awkward joke. 

But time and time again, I would end up right back where I said I would never be. 

Learning to live with depression and anxiety is a fight everyday, and it’s a fight that I’m winning. I have some HUGE L's in the record book, but the wins can outshine the losses if you let them.

It took me a long time to be ok with being on medication to keep me mentally stable. But now, I am ok with that. As long as I get to live and watch the people I love grow, then give me all the medications I need. 

It took me a long time to be ok with my past. But now I see that my past has beauty.

My scarred past is beautiful.

It may not be beautiful to others, but it is to me.

And no one can take that away.